|Posted by anonymous on July 7, 2017 at 10:45 PM||comments (64)|
Today-I spoke with the manager of my Facebook page and it was expressed to me that I get better feedback on issues that are more personal.
I didn’t overstand the remark- for everything that I place in the public domain- is personal. I place my thoughts on the table- step back from them- and let the world examen my essence- for the truth - the real- fears no investigation.
What was truly being expressed was an opinion that I should be more emotional- speak to people's sensitivities- but in reality - that’s what your pastor’s are for- that’s what your life coaches are for- but my assignment is to reach those that are deemed- by this social construct- as unreachable.
I’m neither swayed- nor bound- by public opinion- for public opinion if fickle- feckless- and ever evolving as thought is expanded or decreased- as is evidenced in the scenario involving Jesus. As he came into the town- the popular opinion was praise- the people were shouting - “Hosanna!”- but by Friday - they were screaming- “crucify him!”.
This being the reality- one subjects one self to discontentment- when one is more concerned about what the public thinks- wants - then what one thinks and wants for self.
The popular opinion- concerning the 2016 election- was that Hillary Clinton would win- and the popular vote- was in her favor- but Donald Trump is the president- so popular opinion proved to be ineffective- of no import.
I don’t write to appease emotional voyeurs- cyber activist- or to receive likes or emogis on Facebook. I write to spark thought- electrical currents in the mind of those who have subjected their thought process- or relinquished their constitution- to the herd mentality - that is popular opinion.
I’m not a politician- a serf- or a slave to trends - marketed to the masses in the form of progressive thought- nor do I lather at the idea of appealing to the rigors of social norms- for banality- is not a part of my personality construct.
Though I know that I must recalibrate- to compensate for the 21 years that I’ve been in exile- overstand that my recalibration- will cause the world to adjust.
You may describe that as arrogance- but it is self determination- self actualization- an investment in my own self worth- wherein I can demonstrate- by example- the vast possibilities that lie in wait for one who rises above popular opinion- invests in a cause that is bigger than him/herself- and charts his/her own course to make thought a reality.
In 52 days- you’ll witness my demonstration!
|Posted by anonymous on July 7, 2017 at 10:10 PM||comments (0)|
In my last piece I eulogized a comrade- and admonished those who seek recognition as being veterans from the hood. This has caused some- to once again- ask my position on the Structural Gang CultureⒸ- and again - I’m going to make my position so clear that Stevie Wonder can see it- and place it in the public domain- for the record- that you may overstand my demonstration.
I’ve never advocated the denunciation of the hood- nor have I condoned the method of debriefing for those that are part of the problem must be a part of the solution and there has been far too many lives- sacrificed in this demonstration- in our quest for relevanceⒸ- and access to the american value system of power- wealth- prestige- and inclusion - but it was out of exclusion- discrimination - marginalization - disenfranchisement- and apathy- that the Structural Gang CultureⒸ was born.
I am not attempting to rationalise - or justify - the insensate violence that I’ve perpetuated in the advancement of the gang mentality for the crimes that I committed were not only horrific- but they caused the deterioration of the very same communities that I’ve resided in across america. It is only my attempt- to make pellucid- my position.
Lets approach this reality- realistically- not through the rose tinted lenses of faith without works- words without activity- prayer without deeds- for these practices are rooted in fear- and fear has a chilling effect on motion- known to kill more dreams than failure.
I foster - nor nurture- any form of fear- as it applies to my comrades who are active- for I find the genesis of my work today- in the streets - on the blocks- in the hoods where this activity is prevalent- and if it wasn’t for my experience in the Structural Gang CultureⒸ- I would have never been able to publish the literature - which is absolutely - the cure for the violence that we are witnessing in blighted communities across america- and the world.
Though I’ve been trained - in college curriculum- I was educated in the streets- my experiential block knowledge giving me a PHD in gangology- and this discipline- this subject matter- is not taught in college- this subject matter is hands on - on the job training- and to fail this subject matter - may cost you your life- rather then result in a lower gpa. My organization's motto is - “Changing Gang Behavior From the Inside outⓇ”.
This means that I have abandoned the archaic- co-dependent mentality- that positions us to petition the Government- or wait on some benevolent representation of success to do for us - what we must do for ourselves!
It is us- though we didn’t create the circumstance- who perpetuate the malady that exists in our communities - and the petitioning and protesting has exhausted its effectiveness.
Al Sharpton - Jesse Jackson- and other manufactured leadership - have too - exhausted their effectiveness.
It is now our obligation to exercise self determination- in order to change the trajectory of our collective future- for there is no “I”- without “you”- and there is no “you” - without “me” and the sooner that we adopt- and act in accord with this ideology- the quicker that we can preserve the lives of the youth- that watch us - and pattern themselves after our activity.
Am I the Thug Messiah?
We all are- but only if we choose to lead courageously- correctly- and champion this cause to “Change Gang Behavior From the Inside Out”Ⓡ.
|Posted by anonymous on July 7, 2017 at 10:10 PM||comments (0)|
I’ve been notified that one of my young comrades- whose father- too - is a comrade- was found with a gunshot wound to the head- laying in the streets- like an animal- as if his life was of no import.
I immediately called my comrade Randy “Blue Bear” Dixon- who verified that this tragedy - has in fact taken place- and as he explained the circumstances surrounding the horrific death - my heart was overwhelmed with pain - like someone was puncturing it with an ice pick- and as my eyes filled with salty water- I asked myself - why?
Why must we continue to exhibit the characteristics of beasts - in human form?
Why is life - of no import to us- and our youth are being eradicated from the face of the earth?
Though I’m not a religious man- the answer is found in this scripture - “For I - the lord god - am a jealous god - visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children” - Stop right there!
The sins of the father are visited upon the son- so what we are witnessing - in Fresno California's District 3- is the hell that the fathers have wrought - being visited upon our children - magnified by their own inordinance.
“Every action - has an equal and opposite reaction”.
Because our bodies have a biorhythm - and there is a vibrational frequency attached to our activity - which - in turn - sends ripples into the universe- and because we live in a universe of cause and effect- “Every action - has an equal and opposite reaction”.
We - the fathers - have set in motion a recompense that must be actualized- and if said recompense - skips us- it is visited upon our children - so the scripture states - “Prepare the children for slaughter- for the inequities of their fathers”.
So it's not enough that the fathers quit banging and move out of district 3 - for there is a price that must be paid for the activity that we were engaged in - when we lived in district 3.
How do we right our wrongs? How do we - as fathers - make amends? What must we do to redeem the lives of our children - that we so ignorantly - thought inadvertently - offered up - when we were banngin?
We - as fathers - must atone for the violence that we perpetuated - in our ignorance!
What is atonement?
Atonement is to make amends for a sin- fault- or other wrong.
Atonement is a process by which we- not only redeem ourselves - but we also redeem the lives of our children- that they get a clean slate- a fair start - wherein our madness - is not visited upon them.
How do we atone?
We admit the wrong that we've done- out loud - ask for forgiveness- then we do a good deed - in expiation - of the wrong that we committed.
Who do you think you are Yo-Yo?- that you can speak to us like this.
I am who I have to be- and that is the conscience of this Diamond Crip Demonstration - a father who has two active sons in District 3- saying to you what nobody else- at ground zero - has the testicular fortitude to say to you.
I am your Comrade!
|Posted by anonymous on July 7, 2017 at 10:05 PM||comments (0)|
(Part One of A Three part series) 4/28/17
There are many myths - concerning both the structural gang cultureⒸ- and the psychology that permeates this reality. Most think that we are ruthless killers- born with some maladaptive gene- that proscribes us from feeling emotion- compassion- or rational when it comes to human life- but few have been able to take you into the psychology of a gang banger.
I’ll be your travel guide on this tour- please keep your minds inside of the vehicle - for I can’t be responsible for any misinterpretations - that you’ve been socially - or collegiately orientated to believe - concerning the structural gang cultureⒸ.
There are a plethora of external - environmental stimuli - as well as internal- familial stimuli- that are culpable for the making of a gang banger- and thought I won't address these issues - in totality in this piece- I will convey to the reader- a pithy comprehensible overview- in this three part series- on this reality.
Ride with me.
What is erroneously called (Ganging) - is the most ancient social interaction - among the youth documented.
Just as any social group is initiated - the set - is constructed through a “Diad” - to people who have the same life experiences- and the same perceptions of said life experiences- which have created a void in their lives- “An Avoidant Insecure Attachment”- in the home- and that void procures a need - that is left unfulfilled.
This does not mean that one’s parents are to blame- on the contrary- for one’s parents can exhibit the highest standard of morality- inside the home- and untraditional love- inside the home- and still have a son/daughter that who -when they venture out- are bombarded with the images of a counter productive environ - that supplants the tutelage of the parents - for the child spends more time interacting with the environment- then they do with the parents - who are consumed with the task of providing for the child.
The reality of environment is that - it has the power to effectuate personality construct- within the child- and the child accepts these psychic impressions of who they have to be - in order to survive- influencing and dictating the child's perceptions- and interactions.
If the child lives in a blighted community- the child suffers from lack and the desire to have the things that can't be afforded by the parent- the things that are strategically marketed - as symbols of status- which consequently orientates the child's wants- needs- and desires- opens the child's mind to alternative methods- criminality- to obtain what they've been socially orientated to want- need- and desire.
So gangs are a socially constructed reality- born of collective thought - and masterfully orientated into criminality- through the marketing of status symbols- and being denied access to a value system- that tells a child that they can be anything that they want to be- then discriminating against that possibility- creating in the child - confusion- frustration - and inevitably- insensate violence.
At that moment- the “In group”- and “Out group” mentality is born- and mores and norms are created to both that sustain the “in group”- and transgress the rights of the “Out group”. The Gang Banger is born… To be continued.
|Posted by anonymous on July 7, 2017 at 9:35 PM||comments (0)|
I can remember- standing in the courtroom- witnessing my own funeral- the eulogy being the sentence- life without the possibility of parole. Can you imagine- your fate being expressed so nonchalantly - as you absorb the magnitude of such a reality as- life without the possibility of parole?
During my 21 years - behind these steel curtains - I’ve watched the reality of being confined - without the cutaneous stimulation of a woman- break some of the strongest men- stripping them of their knowledge of civilisation - forcing them into psychological caves wherein savages reside- and the character that they displayed- upon being confined - peeled away - exposing their intrinsik selves.
I’ve watched these men seek solace- in the institution of religion - searching for God outside themselves - not knowing that God can ever be evident outside of self- and to even attempt to make him/her so- negates one's self- because one is going outside of self- to identify that which exists in self.
The word God- merely serves as a garment- to make real- what has always been- always is- and always will be- this is the significance of the usage of language - for if it were not for language - words- a garment- we could never conceptualize that which is infinite.
What was it that sustained me?- one may ask.
It was thought- for I never accepted the sentence that was superimposed upon me. I never excepted prison as my reality- or destiny - and though I was physically apprehended I refused to be psychologically captured.
Everytime that I spoke with my mother- I expressed - “I’m coming home” - and though I know that she believed - I also know that she couldn't fathom how.
In the process of me coming home - this journey- people appeared- some for a season- some for a reason. Those that came for a season - relinquished in the season that they came- and though it was painful- I overstood that it was necessary - that those that came for a reason could be positioned in my demonstration - so when ties were broken- I celebrated- knowing that they were only making room for my blessing. I met a lady once- who asked me - “how much time do you have”.
She was interested in me - at that time - and I replied to her -”they gave me life-but I’m not going to do it!” she smiled coyly- turned on her heels and walked away from me.
Why am I telling you this?
Because I want you to- not only see me- but also see yourselves in the proper context. There is no such thing as an impossibility- for if you can visualize the future- you can position yourselves to walk into that reality. I’m saying that - through the expansion of your consciousness- upon actualizing your Godself - you can absolutely project thought then walk into that reality.
That being expressed- no longer does history have to be written- after it happens. Conceive it - then walk into it. I’m coming home!
|Posted by anonymous on July 7, 2017 at 9:35 PM||comments (0)|
In my endeavors to exact redemption through the atonement process- I’ve been approached with faustian bargains - that if acted upon would have- not only capitulated my integrity - but would have also capitulated the integrity of my work - and for this reason - I rejected said deals - out of hand - for there is no finality in my character - or demonstration - I CAN’T BE BOUGHT!
In my studies of organizational psychology- I’ve found that there has been two character defects- that have always caused organizations to implode- rendering them impotent- ineffective- and undermining the cause for which they were initiated.
This reality finds expression - in every failed organization - that has existed - since the beginning of time - and those two character defects are - envy and venality.
Envy and venality- have been the root cause - of every failed organization - for they are insidious - surreptitious - and masterfully veiled in concern- and financial advancement.
Envy is insidious - in the fact the it can’t be portrayed to the naked eye unless it’s in the presence of the object that it envy’s - and it’s ability to contort itself- to hide within any circumstance- makes it almost undetectable- invisible.
Venality is surreptitious- in the fact that it burrows itself into the intrinsic functionality of organizations- and whispers into the hearts of its membership- by offering itself as a financial solution- when in reality - it is driven by greed- selfishness- and pessimism.
I used the terminology- character defect- rather than character flaw- for a flaw can be corrected - but a defect has no redemptive qualities. If something is defective- it must be discarded.
That being expressed- I was recently offered a significant amount of capital- under the condition that I alter my curriculum- to fit the status quo establishments philosophy on gang prevention.
Without naming names - at this moment - here's my retort- “I am a God!- I refuse to capitulate my position on gang violence prevention and intervention - only to join the feckless- chorus of popular opinion - that has not been effective- in this area of expertise - since the late 1700’s. I’m not an analyst - nor do I follow data- and or statistical trends. I am a real - live - authentic - gang member - who has actualized redemption - through the atonement process- and has been given assignment by the universal order of things - to effectuate change among those trapped in the traumatic- negative aspect- of the structural gang culture mentality- and to change a process “N’STEPⓇ” to appease - fiscal - popular opinion- would not only render me ineffective - but it would cause N”STEPⓇ- to be - out of step - undermining my assignment. “
I make you privy to this fact because I want you to see me- in the proper context. I’m not your average negro! I am a principal's cat - who knows his worth- whose self image has not been distorted by circumstance- and whose self concept has remained intact. Even under the profuse attack on the character of those who languish behind these steel curtains- so when you approach me- know that I am authentic - TILL DEATH DO US!
|Posted by anonymous on July 7, 2017 at 9:30 PM||comments (0)|
As I sat in the courtroom- listening to the judge- prosecutor- and my public pretender- using the Latin language- speaking over my head concerning my future- I thought - “I don’t have a grip on the english language- how do they expect me to overstand this legal jargon”.
In the midst of my thoughts- the sound of the gavel pierced my reality- sounding like the thump of a baseball bat meeting the bone of one's head- bringing me back to the present circumstance- and the words that followed - “Will the defendant please rise”- and I obliged.
“You’ve been found guilty- by a jury of your peers” - I immediately took issue with that statement- for not only- were there no one on that jury- that was of my peers- but there was no one on that jury- that was of my ethnicity. I stood there - erect- shoulders back- head up- chest out- receiving a life without parole sentence- and didn’t even have the presence of mind to blink or flinch.
At that moment- I witnessed my own funeral- for all intent was that I would die behind the steel curtains of the prison industrial complex. I was escorted back to my assigned cell - located in the assaultive module- of the county jail. I stepped inside- still cuffed- and when the door was closed behind me - the escorts opened the slot- built into the door- that they used to feed those of us who were deemed assaultive.
I bent forward at the waist- pushed my cuffed hands backwards- through the slot- and the cuffs were removed. I looked at the imprint - left in my wrist- by impress- from the cuffs being placed on too tight- and sat on my bunk.
Not long after- I was notified that my baby daughter had died. Initially I blamed myself- “If only I’d been there- she may have lived”- only to find out- years later -where the true blame belonged”.
I made a promise to her memory - that I would change my life- and after 21 years-under duress- oppression - adversity- experiencing sophistry and subterfuge on behalf of individuals who presented themselves as friends- comrades- including woman who presented themselves as lovers- I kept my promise- and the universe has yielded to my command to be liberated- the taste of freedom so palpable that i frolic in it spiritually and in 75 days - I’ll experience it physically.
Let the trials- tribulations- and victories in my life- act as catharsis for anyone who is at their wits end- and think that they are not going to make it. We live in a universe of cause and effect- comande the universe with your words and deeds - and it must respond- for you are a direct descendant of the most high- who gave you dominion.
|Posted by anonymous on July 7, 2017 at 9:25 PM||comments (0)|
First and foremost- these thoughts are not meant to be abrasive- on the contrary- they are placed in the public domain - to add context to that which we experience - as human beings- on a continuum.
We all experience - what is termed - the “Judas Factor” - for anytime one endeavors to reach new heights - climb the social ladder - effectuate change among the disenfranchised masses - in that instant- the universe prescribes for you a Judas- one who stands in opposition to your destiny - but we must see said Judas - and their opposition - in the proper context.
Once we endeavour to maximise our potential - actualize our God self- vibrational frequencies are emitted into the universe- mimicking the ripple that expand outward from there point of origin - as in a pebble being thrown into a pond - but six miles high above the earth - is the ceiling of gravity - and this barrier - acts as opposition to the frequencies emitted - but if the frequencies are routed in magnanimity - moral rectitude - God consciousness - it shatters the opposition found in the ceiling of gravity - pierces the universal plaine - impregnating it - and causing it to give birth to circumstances that brings your goals into fruition.
This happens on a electrical - spiritual - vibrational level - but how does this law apply to this carnal - psychical plane.
Once we endeavour to maximise our potential - actualize our God self- there are those who we deem friend - who can’t countenance our advancement that experience a sense of abandonment - and this allows envy to grow within their hearts - giving rise to resentment - causing them to become opposition - a ceiling of gravity to your advancement and success.
But just as the baby bird experiences the pain of breaking through the shell of the egg- to come into light or life - just as the rose must endure the pain of pushing its way upward - through the earth - to be kissed by the sun - and just as a baby must experience pain - pushing its way through a small opening in the womb - to come forth into light or life - we must endure the pain of pushing through the opposition of the enemy - evident in our friends skin - that we too may come into light or life - and achieve our desired goals.
Every living organism must experience pain - in order to effectuate growth - for with growth is pain- and with pain is growth - they are inextricably bound - and necessary for success.
Your desire to be successful must transcend the pain that's attached to the goal - and you must be willing to not only grow past the enemy in your friends skin - but you must be willing to sever all ties - when the enemy in your friends skin - becomes your Judas- and opposes your success.
|Posted by anonymous on July 7, 2017 at 9:25 PM||comments (0)|
I watch as humanity - through limited forms of thought surrender themselves to systems- that superimpose upon them - it interpretation of reality surrounding themselves with material things that permit them to be deemed- as successful - by the limited consciousness of this social construct. A social construct that dictates thought - in these systems - activity- and even one's appearance.
We have become so consumed by this material plain of existence - which is an evanescent illusion - that we’ve capitulated our sovereignty - becoming lost in matter - ferss to our own manufactured dogmas - traditions - laws - and belief systems.
We've allowed ourselves to be imprisoned in this earthly garment- called body- survival becoming our preoccupation - relinquishing the essence of our true selves- our God selves- which affords us the attributes of creativity - and for that reason we suffer under the yoke of oppression - for we choose matter- carnality - to the detriment of our God potential.
Instead of being the expression of thought over matter- we've become thought trapped in matter- creating realities that tether our emotions to this illusionary plain of existence - and for that we perish as matter - instead of elevating and transcending this plane - as the Gods we are.
|Posted by anonymous on July 7, 2017 at 9:20 PM||comments (0)|
As you may know - I am presently transitioning out from behind the steel curtains of the prison industrial complex- and for the past 21 years- I've had to parse my words that I not - through misinterpretation of my position - jeopardise my liberation - but as my international spokesperson stated to me today - "There will come a time when the parser of words will no longer parse his words" - and this is that time.
I must simply know - that my liberation is an intricate part of the universes plan to ameliorate conditions in blighted community's -
and that the universe was created in truth - so in order for me to stay in alignment with the universe- I must - not only stand on and in truth- that I must speak truth to power - and into every circumstance - that is with out truth.
This is not an easy task- for when one stands on and in- and propagates truth - one is immediately subjected to an onslaught of opposition-That is rooted in - and benefits from- the lie.
Here's the demonstration- I've - for the past 21 years- been upon a trek of redemption - atonement- and transformation- and it would seem that anyone that has witnessed my ascension to new levels of humanity- would applaud and support my endeavor - paradoxically- the very system - who's stated goal is to make safer communities by reforming incarcerated persons- have been my greatest opposition.
Notwithstanding the inspiring leadership of Gov. Inslee - The Washington State Dept of Corrections- unaccountability- as it relates to its employees racism- and now malfeasance under the color of law - is the greatest impediment to its inhabitants successful matriculation back into society.
This is not an indictment of all DOC employees- for there are many that have handled me with respect and dignity- but the administrators in positions of authority- those who hold the power as signets - practice and perpetuate a culture of unaccountability- that acts as a corrupting agent of the psyches of new and impressionable minds- coming into the correctional field.
Couple this with the fact that those who are sentenced to lengthy sentences - are not afforded access to educational and vocational classes- trades - that are offered by the facility- though it is a proven fact that education - the learning of a trade - significant lyreduces recidivism- making communities safer- and you have a circumstance - that by proxy- promotes and perpetuates recidivism and less safe communities.
For example - I was sentenced to life without the possibility of parole - in said sentence - proscribed me from accessing classes- and a trade- so my redemption - atonement- and transformation was an internal decision - which compelled me - before my liberation was even a possibility-to invest in the responsibility of ameliorating social ills that I helped to perpetuate in my ignorance- but what happens to the woman/man that wants the same for their lives- but because these avenues to access educational- vocational- and trade classes- are
closed to them those who suffer the inordinate discrimination of an administration that is accountable to no one?
I'll tell you what happens- because I've witnessed it - they fall into despair - and apathy- subjecting themselves to the sociogenic and psychogenic influences that are prevalent in prison environments.
They become even more crimogenic- and when released - they unleash this dehumanisation upon unsuspecting communities throughout
In light of this reality- I'm calling for an audit of the Washington State Dept. of Corrections - their hiring practices evaluated and some form of accountability to the community in wherein they are releasing prisoners- instituted. Lets open the ledgers - peel back this onion- and apply the fragrance of accountability to its putrescence.